C's photos

C had her photo session today. She did really well, and even suggested her own poses. The photographer did a good job capturing real smiles and not just the cheesy grins C flashes for the camera.

M's photos

We go to Sears four times a year for photos. Today we went for M's birthday photo. I did have it scheduled for last week, but then she and C were playing and she got a huge scratch on her forehead the day before the appointment. (You can really see it in the 2/19 blog pics.) While she wasn't particularly cooperative, she still did well and the gal got some cute shots.

Happy 3rd Birthday, M!

M is so funny! She doesn't grasp the birthday concept yet, nor is she overly excited about presents. What she is interested in is the cake! When I wish her a Happy Birthday, she responds with "Happy Birthday, Mommy". She also still wishes me a Merry Christmas each night after I put her to bed.

We finally worked out what she wanted for a birthday lunch (since Grandma and Grandpa At Home couldn't make it for dinner). She kept insisting that she just wanted cake, but finally agreed to Dad making hamburgers in addition to the cake.

She seemed to enjoy her presents, but after receiving her doll from Grandma she had no interest in opening her final present. C finally got her to open it several hours later.

We did take a break in the afternoon to go to her cousin's baptism, and then that night she got to pick any movie to watch. So we watched Night At The Museum, (sigh) again. I guess I should just be thankful it wasn't Jumanji.

Happy Birthday, my love! You bring such a wonderful spirit to our family, and it is my great privilege to be your mother!

Happy Birthday C & M!

P's family is quite large. When all of his family attends a function, we have 12 adults and 17 kids - which feels a bit overwhelming for me at our house. I should also point out that the extended Mod family is not a quiet family. If members of my family attends, it's an even larger group. Since our girls' birthdays are only five days apart, we just opt to have everyone get together once, off premises. Meanwhile, we still celebrate each birthday quietly at home on the date of birth. Anyway, this is the reasoning that leads to what feels like a busy week of birthdays!

Once again, the girls chose to celebrate at Chuck E Cheese. I remember I dreaded family birthday parties at Chuck E's before I had kids. Now it's payback time. This year we lucked out and the place was relatively quiet. C had a great time making new friends, M enjoyed playing the games, and I loved leaving the mess behind!!!

It appears that the best gift this year was the basketball hoop. It was a joint gift for them, and each girl got her own basketball.

My mom is back home

I guess a lot of family members have been getting their updates here, based on the calls my parents have gotten. So mom was released out of ICU this AM, and then released from the hospital at noon. She's really happy to be back home and she sounds pretty good. They told her it would be a few weeks before she's feeling back to normal.

Corporate carnage

Well, the news today was bad enough that my friend called me at home. It was actually much worse than I had anticipated. 41 jobs cut in our region. No worker bees, just management. They didn't even get to say goodbye. This is on top of the 240 lay offs that were announced last month for our other local office, which is where I first started my employment with the company.

Since I'm a worker bee, I do still have a job at the moment. My unit was combined with another that has a totally different function, and I have a new manager. Hopefully my duties and hours will remain relatively the same. My old manager is the only one affected that didn't lose her job, but she is no longer a manager now either.

They say the insurance market is soft now. The company had a real push the end of last year to encourage their employees to become customers too (but no discounts offered). I have to say that I'd be pretty mad about moving my business just to turn around and get fired.

In other news, Mom is doing okay. They planned to keep her in ICU until tomorrow to keep her closely monitored. I'm assuming that means she won't be going home tomorrow, but she is hopeful that she will.

Happy Birthday, again, C!

As I mentioned in our intro, both of our girls have open adoptions, although the degree of openness is quite different. Since C was born locally, we have regular visits with her birthfamily, at least once a year for her birthday. I feel bad that M won't have the same kind of contact with her birthfamily largely due to geographics, but also different circumstances. Hopefully she will understand as she gets older and it won't be an issue. I know I worry too much about things that haven't come to pass yet, but that's just what I do.

I've made a point of discussing adoption regularly with C. We have terrific photos of her birth (C-section) where she can see quite clearly that she is coming from her birthmother's tummy. I have no doubt that she "gets" these things because I've heard her explain them to others. Beyond that, she doesn't really understand yet her relationship to her birthfamily. We refer to everyone by name and I explain all members of the family based on their relationship to the birthmom - her mom, her other daughter, etc. I want to give her all the pieces of the puzzle now, and then as she gets older and can better comprehend, she'll see how the puzzle fits together in relation to her.

Anyway, last night we had a birthday party at McDonald's with C's birthmother and family. We had a pleasant visit while the kids had a great time playing! C came home last night excited about all of her "friends" and the great presents they brought her. This morning she climbed into my bed and asked me to read her a book - "How I Was Adopted" by Joanna Cole.

One day I'm glad to leave behind

Yesterday was just one of those days. I had my annual review at work, everything is fine - no surprises there. Got a measly raise, but in our current corporate environment, any raise is a good thing. Realistically, I'm still paid quite well for what I do. If this job ceases to exist, I really would not be able to find any other part time work to replace it.

When I got back to my desk, my phone rang. It was Dad. Mom was taken by ambulance to their local hospital that morning. The bug she caught from C last week had turned into pneumonia and there were other things that had caused Dad great concern. As of last night, she is still really sick, but is doing much better. Other issues are being tested and ruled out, so far nothing out of the ordinary. She will probably be there for a couple days though. She doesn't want the girls to see her at the hospital, so I guess a visit will have to wait. It sounds like she is going to be fine, but feel free to remember her in your prayers if you are so inclined.

Back at work, by the afternoon, rumors started flying about reorganization on the regional level. Some changes in management are expected. Big wigs are coming in to town. Last minute conference calls are scheduled and last minute meetings are planned. The highest level of management in this office is not looking like they are having good days. Being part time, I'm feeling very vulnerable because, depending on current leadership, support of having part time employees vary - and I know it was a topic of conversation in a managers meeting not that many months ago. My friend promises to call me if it appears I don't need to return to work next week : ) I'm mostly kidding, but everyone is feeling the tension and uncertainty - particularly management (which, I should clarify, I am not a part of).

I had a horrible migraine and nausea all day at work that just wouldn't respond to any amount of Excedrin Migraine. Miraculously, it lifted within an hour of leaving work! That never happens! Hopefully things will have settled down by the time I return next Monday. I don't think I'm going to call in to find out what happened.

Happy 5th Birthday, C!

Well, birthday season at the Mod house is upon us. Our week is full of birthday celebrations - starting with C today. Tomorrow we have a birthday party with C's birth family. Then on Thursday it is a combined birthday party for C & M with all of our family at Chuck E Cheese. Finally, Saturday we'll have a small party at home for M.

The day started as any other, with C politely saying thank you when we wished her a happy birthday. About an hour into the day it occurred to me to explain to her that she was five years old now. "Now? Right now?" she asked. Once she realized that she was a year older already, the excitement kicked in. She checked the mirror several times to see how much bigger she looked. She stood up straight to show that she was taller.

We went to the grocery store to pick up things for her birthday dinner and she picked out her birthday cake. Surprisingly, she set her heart on the chocolate cheesecake sampler platter. Ahh, I love this girl!!! Since there will be plenty more cake to be had this week, I was more than happy to oblige. Oreo ice cream and daddy's favorite Carmel Caribou ice cream to top things off.

Since it was a beautiful sunny day, quite a rare commodity in the Pacific Northwest in February, we packed a picnic lunch and headed to the park. I hadn't taken into consideration the breeze, which didn't seem like much until we were shivering at our picnic table in the sun. We did still get some play time before we headed home to eat lunch in the warmth of our kitchen. Later the girls would go outside to play a little basketball with their uncle and cousin while I prepared for the event.

Sadly, Grandma and Grandpa At the Beach weren't able to come as grandma was in bed sick with the bug she picked up from C at their last visit. Sorry!

C was quite specific about what she wanted for her birthday dinner - chicken, rice, toast (french bread would have to do), and sandwiches (if you really want it, you'll have to make one with the chicken and bread). She balked at the green salad on the table because she didn't ask for that, so we gave her a one time pass since it was her special day.

The girls with Grandpa At Home

Thinking of her wish

Happy Birthday baby! I can't believe I've been a mom for five years now. We are so thankful and blessed to be your parents!

Foster daughter update

Many of our family and friends had the opportunity to meet our foster daughter of six months last year. The girls and I visited her again today, and I thought I'd give you an update. First off, she turned two last month. She is doing very well! She looks happy and healthy, is talking more, and is much calmer than when she lived with us. I think this new environment is really good for her since she doesn't have to compete for attention with two other young kids. In her new home she has one eight year old sister. The sister initially had a hard time adjusting to not being an only child, but is now really enjoying her new role. Her case hasn't seemed to have progressed in the last four and a half months, which is frustrating. However, once again it appears that adoption is back on the table and the new family is very much on board if it goes that direction. Only time will tell how things will turn out, but if she doesn't go back to her father, at least she won't be moving anywhere else.

Glamin' it up

There is little in this world that my girls enjoy more than dressing up. At home they love to play dress up, and on Sundays a simple skirt and blouse won't do for church, it has to be a full on fancy dress.

So I was surprised the other day when C came downstairs obviously feeling the epitome of glamour, but without the dress. She posed like a model while I took a few shots.

Meanwhile, M got a new do from her cousin next door. She looks so different. I prefer the curls!

C said

"M, if you let daddy brush your teeth, I'll give you something I don't like anymore from my room."

Stinka

Last night I had a fun time hanging out with M while C and P went to a planned father/daughter preschool event. She says the funniest things that I never manage to write down, so I quickly forget. Now that I'm blogging, I'm trying to keep a better record.

When we went out to the garage to feed Jinx (the cat) she exclaimed "Oh my heck, I don't believe this!" I still don't know to what she was referring.

In the last week she has started saying her bedtime and mealtime prayers by herself. Last night was probably the third time for her to say the blessing on the food (in Swedish, no less) by herself. In the same breath as the "amen", she flew out of her seat bursting with pride and said "I'm a booger now!" I know she meant big girl, but it still tickled my funny bone.

I took a little video of her after dinner in all of her silliness. She is talking about how she and her sister suckered Grandpa at Home into thinking it was okay for them to take a nap together in the same bed, and then hid in the closet to play.

We had to watch that video seven times after taking it. Each time M laughed hysterically at herself.

Finally last night as I was putting her to bed, she put both of her hands on my face to lecture me on why I shouldn't go to work today. Her biggest arguments are "I'll misted you. I cried for you. It's not fair." and my personal favorite "Daddy is NOT the Mommy!"

Definitely NOT Putting My Best Foot Forward

For the second time in the last six months, I arrived at work today and realized that I was wearing two different shoes. I guess sensible shoes just all look (and apparently) feel the same at 7am. At least the difference in today's shoes (left) was a little more subtle.

C said

"Grandma, will you marry my daddy so you can live with us here always?"

Grandma and Grandpa are in town!

My parents are retired and live at the beach. However, between dad's church responsibilities and mom's doctors appointments, they seem to come into town pretty regularly and often will stay a night or two with us. The girls LOVE when they come. They do love both sets of grandparents (P's parents live just a 1/2 mile away, so we see quite a bit of them), but after they've clarified whether it is Grandma and Grandpa At The Beach or Grandma and Grandpa At Home we have much squealing and jumping. It is certainly gratifying to see how much they love their grandparents, and I know it does much for them too to be met with such a high level of enthusiasm. However, the best thing about when they come to town is that they usually suggest P and I go out and leave the kids to them. Wahoo! You don't have to ask me twice!!!

We decided to go see a movie. I know, how creative is that? But this is one of our favorite past times, and now the number of movies we actually see in a theater are few and far between. Luckily for me, P didn't ask me what was playing (meaning he'd get a say) but rather what did I want to see. Maybe it was because he felt so guilty because the last movie we saw was his choice and we both hated it (I Am Legend). I decided to pick something that he probably wouldn't have agreed to had he been given the opportunity to weigh in. Yes, I am that kind of wife.

So we went to see Juno. The only reason it was even on my radar was because there had been much discussion about it on my adoption group lists. It's about a 16 year old girl who gets pregnant, can't go through with an abortion, so she makes an adoption plan for her baby. I have to say that I loved it! It was funny, sweet and irreverant. I bawled through much of it, much to the chagrin of my husband - but he should be used to it by now. Movies with positive adoption themes always tug at my heart strings. I still tear up at the end of Meet The Robinsons, and I can't tell you how many times I've seen that now. Anyway, back to Juno, I would highly recommend it for adults if you are not super easily offended. P kind of grudgingly admitted that he liked it too, although he was distracted by the teenage vernacular that we are apparently totally out of touch with!

P has teased me mercilessly for years for my waterworks display at movies and even TV programs (but so far, no commercials). I try to discretely wipe away my tears so he won't notice, but even my eyes welling up is cause for jest. Well, now I am happy to report that I am not the only crier in the family. C cried at her first movie recently. Actually, she cried the first two times she saw it. It was A Little Princess, and it was at the end when Sarah's father didn't recognize her. Well, crying isn't really the most acurate term. My sensitive little girl literally wailed the first time she saw it. (I would also recommend this movie for anyone with young girls.) I sure look forward to crying through many a movie with her as she gets older!

I have TWO beautiful daughters

My husband and I have a pet peeve I'd like to share with you, one that particularly frustrates P. Whenever one of us is out with the girls, strangers make a lot of comments about our youngest daughter. Seriously, if I could charge a $1 for every compliment on M's hair, we'd easily be able to fund her college. People stop us very frequently to say how beautiful M is, and mostly just ignore C. C is old enough now that she does notice, and while she doesn't say anything, you can see the hurt on her face. I think it bothers P so much because he doesn't know how to respond. I usually try to reach out to physically touch C, and say something like "thank you, we have been blessed with two beautiful daughters". Some will then say something nice about C, but you can tell that it doesn't have much meaning for her at that point.

C garnered her fair share of attention when she was a baby, but once she became a big sister that all changed. I do know that being the youngest has a lot to do with it, because last year, when we had a foster daughter 11 months younger than M, M didn't attract the same volume of attention as she did before and does now. I also understand that much of it is simply because M stands out from us. We live in a very open minded area, and I never get any stares and rarely any comments about us being a transracial family - but let's face it, people notice a brown skinned child accompanied by a caucasian parent. I'm thankful that the attention received is positive, I just wish people would be a little more sensitive.

Last night P relayed an incident to me that just broke my heart. I guess C was looking at M and said, "M, you are soooo beautiful. I wish I was beautiful like you. I wish I had curly hair like you. I wish I had brown skin like you. I wish I had brown eyes like you. I wish I had dark hair like you." Of course, P did all he could to assure her that she was indeed beautiful too.

I always figured that when the girls got older, we'd be perming C's hair and straightening M's hair, and they'd wish they looked more like the other - but I never thought it would start so soon. Meanwhile, we'll keep doing all we can to help them develop healthy self esteems that are NOT centered on their appearances.

While I'm dwelling on the physical differences between the girls, I thought I'd share a little anecdote from when C was younger. She was barely two when M was born. She must have thought that all new babies were brown, because she used to tell us that she had brown skin when she was little too. (She also used to say that her hair was going to get curly when she got older.) If I showed her a picture of her as a baby, and held it up to a picture of M, she was unable to tell me which one was her! Can you tell the difference? (These are their six month photos.)

Working Mom

I work part time in the claims end of the insurance industry. I feel very blessed to have this job. Besides the fact that we really need my income and benefits, I enjoy the break. With young children, my world feels so small now. I love still keeping a foot in the adult world, if only for two days a week - which is really all I need to keep my sanity. Personally, I believe I am a better mom because of it. The best thing about working part time is that it allows me to be a hands on mom most of the time! That's the best job of all because I KNOW that I am far more appreciated by my kids than by my employer.

I work two days a week (10 hour days), and at least one of those days it is a real challenge to get out of the house. On a good day, I'm gone before the girls wake up. However, if one or both is up before my departure, then we have waterworks. Not just waterworks, but weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth. (C has a real flair for the dramatic.) C is most likely to be up, and makes it the hardest to go - and if M isn't up by then, she certainly will be soon with all the ruckus. "Moooommmmmm, please don't go. I don't want you to work today. Oh, mommmmmmmmm!" Repeat, repeat, repeat....you get the idea. Then we have the endless hugs and kisses and reassurances, and then with a little help from dad, I eventually make it out the door while blowing kisses and waving goodbye as they watch from the window. It's bittersweet, really. It makes me happy that they would rather have me at home, but I feel so bad (for about seven minutes - my commute time) for leaving them.

Introduction

Welcome. I'm M Mod. I'm a mom to two beautiful girls, and I've been married to P Mod for almost 15 years. I've worked in insurance for 11 years now, and my husband is an entrepreneur. He's in business with his parents, and together they own two restaurants and an auto wholesale company. His life is stressful and chaotic, and I wouldn't recommend his career choice (especially the restaurants) to anyone. I don't do stress very well, it seriously gives me migraines. As a result, I really try to keep our home and family life very separate from his work life - but it's hard since he's in a family business, and often works from home. At any rate, you won't be hearing much about his work here since I strive to not get caught up in all the drama. That could be a whole other blog by itself!

What you will be hearing about is the girls. Lots. It took a long time for me to become a mom, and most days I LOVE being a mom! The fact that we even have our girls is truly a miracle, and I'm sure I'll be writing about adoption too. In a nutshell, both of our adoptions pretty much fell in our laps. We weren't signed up with any agencies waiting to be picked. We got a phone call from a family friend to see if we were interested for our first adoption, and our second came about because of a conversation with someone at church who knew our daughter was adopted. Both adoptions are domestic, independent and open. Both times we had about three weeks notice before the girls were born. Our oldest, C, is four years old and homegrown. We were at the hospital when she was born and were able to hold her within minutes. She's been home with us since she was two days old. M is two years old and was born in American Samoa. Due to the distance, and extra paperwork required, we arrived in American Samoa when she was 12 days old. What a blessing these girls are!

While I do a fair job of documenting our lives by taking pictures, I've really fallen short when it comes to making some sort of a written record of the great things they do and say. I hope to rectify that from this point on by keeping a sort of online journal via this blog. I hope you'll enjoy!